How to handle an exit interview? Don't complain, don't explain and get out quickly

Q: I'm being downsized at the end of the month. (Let's just say it: I'm losing my job.) I have an exit interview scheduled. Any recommendations on what to say and what not to say? What's the purpose of an exit interview anyway?

NICK'S REPLY: Shrunk, downsized, booted, let go ... the euphemisms are tiring. The purpose of the exit interview is twofold, though I'm sure some personnel experts could give us a few more. First, it's to help your company learn from the experience of a terminated employee. Second, they will ask you to sign an agreement designed to protect the company from legal repercussions after you depart.

I know how cynical this sounds, but in my experience exit interviews are conducted more for the second reason than the first. My advice is intended more to keep you out of trouble than to help you serve as a good "downsizing consultant" to your employer.

Be polite, don't vent, say as little as possible, and get it over with. If you can decline to do it at all, then decline. There is almost no upside for you, but there are potential risks if you say something that bothers the interviewer. For example, a blunt comment about your boss could put you on an informal blacklist in your industry. Or the written exit interview report could stay in the company's files a long time, only to resurface years down the road when someone checks your references. Why chance it?

Don't complain, and don't explain. If the company has employee relations problems, you're not going to help fix them now. If what you thought really mattered, the company would have asked your opinion while you were a valued employee, not when it's about to toss you out the door. It's a little late to be talking about your employment experience. If you want to offer useful insights to your boss, do it privately. Talk to your manager, not to a personnel clerk who barely knows you. I can't think of one benefit to you in an exit interview.

THE HEADHUNTER TIP:

Help the manager to like you.

Managers hire people they like, but it's often a mistake. Smart managers hire candidates who can do the work profitably and fit on the team. Nonetheless, likability is useful to job hunters. The key is that we tend to like people who are interested in us.

Express your interest early in an interview by asking the manager:

-- What company she came from.

-- What made her choose this line of work.

-- What she finds challenging about her job.

-- Where she sees her department going.

(If you are disingenuous or if you get too personal, then shame on you!) You won't win a job from a smart manager if you can't demonstrate the ability to do the work. But it's also important to help the manager to like you. Express interest in things that interest the boss and that may help you get hired.

Copyright 2009. Distributed by Universal Press Syndicate

Nick Corcodilos is author of "Ask The Headhunter: Reinventing the Interview to Win the Job" and the host of www.asktheheadhunter.com. He can be reached by e-mail at seattle@asktheheadhunter.com or at North Bridge Group, P.O. Box 600, Lebanon, NJ 08833. Sorry, no personal replies.